The official site of the Torch, the student-run newspaper at Glenbrook North High School.

Torch

The official site of the Torch, the student-run newspaper at Glenbrook North High School.

Torch

The official site of the Torch, the student-run newspaper at Glenbrook North High School.

Torch

Ironing out expectations

The night before my first day at Glenbrook North, I was nervous. I was scared about getting lost, but I was mostly fretting about making friends. To ease my nerves, my mom told me a story that I have carried with me throughout my high school career:

A woman was looking for a new dry cleaner and her friend recommended one.

“He’s great. You’ll love him,” the friend assured her. Yet, when the woman went to the dry cleaner for the first time, he was rude and disinterested. The woman was caught off guard since her friend had given him such a great review. When the friend asked how the dry cleaner was, the woman told her of the disappointing experience.

“Give him one more chance,” the friend pleaded. “I know you’ll love him.”

The second time the woman went back, the dry cleaner was great. He was friendly, enthusiastic and helpful. Convinced that the friend had told the dry cleaner about how unsatisfactory the first experience was, the woman asked, “Did you tell him I thought he was a jerk?”

“No,” the friend replied. “I told him you thought he was great.”

My first day of Honors World Civilization my freshman year, I entered the room alone. I was intimidated by the unfamiliar faces and the large, stiff backpacks of these strangers. I wrote these kids off as “unapproachable smart kids” and braced myself for the long year ahead.

Needless to say, World Civ became my favorite class. Halfway through the year, something clicked. I stopped assuming these students would be unhelpful and started asking for assistance. I stopped assuming they would be boring and started chatting them up. I broke out of my comfort zones and started treating my classmates as if I liked them, and it turned out I really liked them. To this day, my World Civ class has an active Facebook thread where we freely discuss our love for Mr. Vincent.

It’s very simple: people want us to see the best in them. Yet, as high schoolers, it’s much easier for us to label people than give people the chance to show us what they’re really about. We create cliques, we create walls and we stereotype the people on the other side of the wall expecting them to be one way or another.

This is how we fall into a trap. By assuming something, it will become true. If we treat people like we are going to be disappointed in them, they will sink to our expectations. But, if we treat people like we see the best in them, they will rise to the occasion. This is what I did with my World Civ class. At first, I dismissed the other students, judging them to be different than me, but after looking for the best in them I have found out about just how wonderful my peers were.

Some of us will be thrown into crazy new situations next year in college, but many still have the rest of their high school career ahead of them. Yet, for all of us, we can use the lessons that the dry cleaner teaches to make the most out of our relationships. It’s time we start expecting the best from our peers, family members and teachers, and finding just how fulfilling our relationships can be.