Doubting yourself provokes self-decline

I exude positivity.

I wouldn’t be surprised if you had to do a double take on that comment. Nowadays, positive comments are unusual, while it is all too common to make self-deprecating jokes.

One day in English class, we were put into groups to edit each other’s essays. As a preface for each essay, almost every person in my group said something like, “Mine’s really bad, just saying. Like I don’t even know what I wrote,” followed by a shaky giggle.

And let me assure you, none of them were “really bad.” I was beyond impressed by the eloquence of my peers’ writing.

Still, far too many people make negative comments about themselves or their surroundings as conversation starters or silence-fillers. Rather than those comments being an accessory of a conversation, they dangerously become the subject or basis of a conversation to be built upon.

I realize that I make negative comments too. I’m sure we’ve all been caught saying, “I hate my next class, I’m terrible at it,” after thinking of something to say as we walk down the hall with someone we’re trying to make conversation with. Or we’re caught murmuring, “I so failed that test,” to our neighbors during that awkward post-test, contemplative silence.

I get it. A lot of the time we’re all just eternally hungry, zombie-like teenagers trudging around school. We can’t help but complain.

However, the more often we say such defeatist and pessimistic things, the more those things integrate themselves into our internal thoughts. According to a study conducted by the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, college students who reflected on negative aspects of past events experienced lower self-esteem and well-being.

In short, a negative conscience evolves from negative thoughts.

Alternatively, we should start filling those awkward post-test  silences with encouragement to a neighbor. While conversing with someone in the hall, talk about the good things that happened during the day. Heck, give yourself a nice compliment.

You may be surprised at how your thinking evolves.