“Mom, you’ve already told this story 500 times. I’ve heard it before.”
That was what I’d say every time my mom told me the story of how she and my dad reunited after being separated in different countries for 21 years. That same story that now makes me believe love was an invisible string tying my parents together in Chicago despite last seeing each other at 4 years old in their neighboring backyards in Ukraine.
Just a few years ago, I didn’t realize brushing off a story like that meant I was also brushing off a piece of my mom’s heart and where I came from in the process. In a world moving so fast, where we’re so focused on what’s next, we must remember the power of listening to others’ stories by making time for the past. When we spend a moment listening to others’ stories, we learn more about ourselves by getting a glimpse into their lives and building our relationships with each other on a deeper level.
What really made me realize the significance of sharing stories was the time I interviewed Shelby Yastrow, the retired vice president and chief legal officer of McDonald’s, for an article I was writing. Though Torch interviews are typically 30 minutes long, I spent over two hours on the phone with him. Any story he gave me was so thrilling, whether it was about playing golf with Tiger Woods, working with Michael Jordan or witnessing Ray Kroc sign the legal document to purchase McDonald’s. Towards the end of our lengthy conversation, he informed me that even though many of the stories he shared may not find a place in my article, he was grateful to have someone, besides his kids, listen to the incredible memories he’d bottled up for numerous years.
That moment stayed with me. His stories weren’t just about his career, they were pieces of a life that had gone largely unshared. Each anecdote became more than just an additional quote to incorporate in my article; it became a gift.
Whether sitting in math class or at a college interview, take a moment to listen to someone else’s story. Though it may seem time-consuming, to that person, it may be the first time someone truly cared enough to listen and make that individual feel significant. When life feels centered around future ambitions, listening can seem like a luxury that is unaffordable. Yet it’s really listening that is one of the most powerful gifts we can offer each other. There doesn’t always need to be a witty reply or a polished response. All that’s required is your unwavering presence.
We may never truly know how long others have held onto a story, or how many times they’ve silenced themselves because someone, like me a few years ago, dismissed their story as boring or repetitive. So the next time my mom shares the beautiful story of how she and my dad found their way back to one another after spending so much of their lives separated, I will be delighted to say: “Thank you for sharing that story. It means more than you know.”