I’m proud to say I’m Korean American. So it’s probably easy to imagine my confusion when a woman I met while volunteering asked me repeatedly to teach her how to speak Hawaiian.

Her other questions were no better: Did my parents have jobs? Did I have a house? Was I even a citizen?

Later, my friend and I shared a few laughs about the bizarre exchange, and I found myself largely unaffected by the comments.

Looking back, I realize I should’ve been offended. I volunteered my time and in return received an interrogation about my family and culture, chock-full of brazen assumptions. But those accusations barely registered, and my indifference to the offensive interaction revealed how desensitized I’d become to attacks on my identity.

Jokes about race have become commonplace, and it can feel like targets are expected to just laugh along. I often see videos of outright racist behaviors that play into harmful stereotypes and comment sections flooded with crying-laughing emojis, concerns for morals long forgotten.

Too often, harmful language or actions go unchallenged, and many have grown accustomed to hearing and dismissing offensive remarks. 

While racism can’t be solved in a day, we can begin by not being perpetrators or mindless bystanders. When we make seemingly harmless jokes or laugh along, we allow racist behaviors to continue.

I instead urge you to fight wrongful behavior when you see it. If speaking up feels uncomfortable, awkward silence is better than awkward laughter. Asking the offender to explain why their racist joke is funny can force reflection for both the perpetrators and those laughing along. And when an offense goes further than an ignorant joke, bringing the issue to student resources is sometimes the best option.

By choosing to take action, we can avoid contributing to a pattern of overlooking hateful speech and dismissing racist behaviors.

If we don’t change, we perpetuate an environment where victims constantly endure discrimination and become accustomed to staying silent. Perhaps this is why, when casually questioned whether I belong in the very country where I was born, it struck me as nothing more than a funny story.